jordanabina
I need to tell you about my first experience bicycling in Napa Valley. But before I do, a story.
I was recently given a bike from a good friend of mine Jake. Jake is a built cat and probably has about .25% body fat on him, and he loves to ride. Jake said he wanted to make me something, which at first made me a little nervous. After letting me know about his new idea of making something for me he texted me a couple weeks later. He asks me an interesting question. What was my favorite color. I said black. This obviously wasn’t the answer he was looking for because he immediately asked for another color. I said neon green.
Obviously. A couple weeks later he reached out again, this time with another question. He asked me how tall I was and what my pant size was, now I was nervous. He told me not to fear, but c’mon now. A week before I left for a summer trip I get a call. Jake asks if I he could come over to drop off his project. Here we go. My buddy Jake rolls up in his lifted pickup. No doors, with this sick black and neon green road bike, just for me. Incredibly generous, and thoughtful. Then it became time to ride. This last week was my first ride, all the way to work and back. Here are 4 things I noticed. Thanks Jake, you’re a boss.
Now, let’s talk about my first time bicycling in Napa Valley.
Drivers don’t really like bike riders, maybe.
Let me clarify something, I didn’t even have a bad experience with anyone. There wasn’t one driver who did anything shady or even look at me weird. Yet I had this feeling in the back of my mind like I was annoying everyone on the road. First of all, cars are really fast when you’re on a bike next to them. I didn’t like feeling the wind of vehicles blow past me as I was riding. Especially because each time it happened, I imagined what it would be like to get smashed into. One crazy thing about riding on the street is you go in the same direction that traffic is going. You can’t always see what’s behind you.
I’ve seen people bicycling in Napa Valley who have those little mirrors on their helmets. I never really thought about how important they are. For now, I’m just going to steal a make-up mirror from my wife. Then duct tape it to the side of my helmet, problem solved. But is it me or are people genuinely annoyed by people riding bikes?
I felt like a nuisance out there, and in my mind I was like, stay out of everyone’s way. If you are a person who is annoyed by bike riders (is that what they’re called?). Then when you are driving your vehicle just remember that it’s much scarier to be them than you. They probably already think you hate them. It’s a deep instinctual hatred for bikers that make us print out share the road stickers and stuff. Bikers unite! (I’ve only done it once and will probably quit eventually but for now I’m totally in the ranks)
Someone needs to make a more comfortable road bike seat.
Now listen. I understand that certain bikes have different seats. But from what I can tell most road bikes only have these really small, non-cushioned, torture seats. Seats that make you want to stand up the entire time. I know what you’re thinking. I could get some of those biker shorts. The shorts that have the padding down, well down there. I will not be doing so. For one, just putting those on in the privacy of my own home would be embarrassing enough. The few short minutes of having them on while walking to my back would be too much for me. Besides I’m riding to work, and I can’t show up wearing something like that.
I know the serious bikers do it, and that’s great, but I’m just not there yet. I was also wearing jeans, dumb decision. Next time I might just be in a Speedo or something, aerodynamic. Guard your eyes, and your heart. Back to the issue at hand. I’m looking for that lazy boy seat to be on top of a road bike. It’s got to be out there somewhere. And if it isn’t, maybe it’s your destiny to make it. Thank you in advance. The next morning, I got up early for breakfast and sat at my dining table to eat. My rear end was so sore I almost passed out, I guess it needs to get stronger? That’s weird. Next one.
Having glasses is annoying.
I don’t like contacts and I’m never going to wear them. It isn’t an option for me. I will always continue to whine about wearing glasses, especially after this bike ride. I don’t know if it’s the shape of my glasses plus the angle of my head as I rode but there was perfect Jetstream flowing directly into the corner of my eyes, not fun. There was only way I could kind of deal with it. It was by looking up or to the side which probably made me look like a psychopath. At point one the way home I pulled up behind a biker who looked far more experienced then I was.
He had like those baskets on the sides of his bike. They filled with stuff that looked like you need if you plan on riding a bike. Also, he had those shoes from outer space that clip into the pedals of the bike. Here is what would happen if I had those shoes. I would clip in to my bike only to forget how to unclip them. Then have to deal with a very slow and methodical falling experience. Anyways. I pulled up next to him at a red light. We looked at each other and I realized by his facial expression that I must have looked strange. I’m sure it looked like I had been weeping. Just a dude going for a very emotional bike ride where I sing sad songs and let my emotions flow. Thanks glasses.
Riding a bike isn’t as bad as I thought.
After the first 60 seconds had passed, I was thinking about one thing. Turning around and coming home. I usually have really great intentions. Usually about working out and staying fit. But then I start to exercise, and my body rejects the idea all together. My breathe was disappearing. I had no idea where it went. My legs were wondering what had happened to the good life. Another thing was the bike trail crosses behind a Cross Fit gym. I knew I didn’t want anyone in there to see me struggling. Who knows what they’d do to me. So I kept on, peddling away toward the destination, pushing through a monsoon of regret.
If anything is certain, Napa Valley is beautiful. Look at this picture.
But as time when on, it felt pretty good. I caught some momentum. I ended making good time, even though I have no idea what would be considered a slow time. In fact, that’s what I always have wondered about these people I see riding road bikes. Where are they going? Better yet, where did they start and are they going to ride back? Have you ever seen a biker in the middle of nowhere? Ever wonder how in the world they got all the way out here? I think it would be appropriate to wear some sort of sign. Something that signifies what you’re doing or where your headed and why.
I had on normal clothes and a back pack. So you could infer I was on my way somewhere. But what about the people who wear the painted-on bike outfit? Where. Are. You. Going. Anyway, I would encourage a bike ride to anyone who is reading this, which may just be my mom. Hi mom.
I did download a pretty sick app. Check it out at https://www.strava.com/mobile.
